Nov 16, 2007 - SERIOUSLY.... ?    No Comments

How Exotic

I’ve been thinking again…yeah, I know…you thought you smelled smoke and I am here to celebrate it’s not from a wildfire near Malibu…Why do they call it EXOTIC WEAR? It’s generally not that exotic. In fact, there’s not really much to it at all.

Do wild dogs hunt cow? Then why do we feed them BEEF? How about cats? Do they deep sea fish for TUNA? Then why do they eat it? And can someone explain to me why the price of cat food fluctuates more than the price of oil? It’s just CAT FOOD!!

How about civil servants? These people are rarely civil and their servitude leaves something to be desired….after all, they don’t call it going postal for nothing! What is the civil service exam anyway… and why does it seem only foreigners can pass it?

And while we’re on the post office – Why do people have to see every variety of stamp before they purchase a package when the line behind them is at least a block long. I mean, they’re just stamps!! They are going to get inked!! Unless you’re into collecting, they’re merely sticky pieces of expensive paper that seems to get more expensive almost annually without any real service changes. I still have to stand in a loooong line when I go to the post office so that the only postal attendant who is working can watch the line get longer while her fellow postal peers go ‘on break’!

And then there are the people who cannot fill in forms while standing in line. Is that SO hard? Fill in 2 or 3, but at least get the addresses on them…you can do that, can’t you?

Who decides what gets put on a stamp? The purpose of a stamp is to go black and NEVER come back!! Who cares what it looks like along the way. Bring down the cost. Make ugly stamps. What kind of life is that? Imagine, you’re born only to be cancelled…sounds like the NBC TV season!!

Hey, and is it my imagination or are those talk show guests on things like Springer, Maury and the others always southerners? Is there a government subsidized town somewhere in the south that is some sort of genetic experiment where they breed talk-show guests? These people are not dysfunctionally normal, they are downright dysfunctionally dysfunctional.

And why are we bombarded with pharmaceutical advertising?? Are Americans that sick, really? Of course, they only appear to suffer from sleep disorders and sexual diseases…any correlation there? And do you actually pay attention to these ads? The side effects sound worse than any illness I have that the medicine may help. There’s a fat burning medication for instance that has a side effect of FOUL BOWEL!! And allergy medications that take away your runny nose replacing it with a BLOODY NOSE. OUCH!! Heal one symptom WHILE CREATING SOMETHNG WORSE. They have medicines now for things I didn’t even know were diseases. Social Anxiety Disorder…yeah, didn’t we use to call that SHYNESS!! How about RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME…and that one’s a gasser, too! The cure ‘dopamine agonists’ causes PATHOLOGICAL GAMBLING DISORDER!!! And I quote “Researchers theorize that, in some people, such strong and specific stimulation in these neuronal pathways can prompt compulsive, pleasure-seeking behaviors such as pathological gambling.“*Â How sweet it IS!! It’s a hypochondriac’s dream.

And don’t even get me started on that stupid rap pepto bismol uses to clarify the symptoms that IT clears up – bet you were really proud to call mom about being in THAT ad!!

Did you ever notice that once a person breaks their hip, its only a matter of time before they die? Why is that? Maybe because we’re living longer or not dying when we’re supposed to because of the advancements in medicine and technology. So I think now God has invented these little gremlins…and their job is to come up alongside the person who refuses to go and kick them in the hip like Tonya Harding did to Nancy Kerrigan’s knee. Next thing you know, they’re on the Heaven bound express and the conductor is looking at them saying “Ticket please.”


(source:Â )

Comments are closed.